The Wicker Man (2006)

Discussion in 'Reader Reviews' started by Ash J. Williams, Sep 9, 2006.

  1. baggio

    baggio Well-Known Member

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    Fair enough. I just haven't seen the original in years myself. Maybe its time to revist it.
     
  2. onebyone

    onebyone Guest

    While the original has a nice, slow build in suspense, the remake had a pretty quick slide into absurdity. I can't believe the director of In the Company of Men, a movie that made me distrust men forever, did this. It just goes to show you that not everyone can direct horror/suspense.

    However, the remake is just killer damn funny. Hilarious. I almost died laughing. The best part was that I watched it with a total movie snob who doesn't appreciate bad movies like I do. They look at my DVD collection and just shake their heads. However, at the time of the bike jacking, they too started laughing and didn't stop until the end. Hell, I had to pause it when Cage showed up with his bear suit so they could get their breath. At the end, they said, "I think I finally get your taste in movies." It was glorious.
     
  3. Luna

    Luna Guest

    All I have to say to that is...

    *whooshSMASH*
     
  4. maybrick

    maybrick Well-Known Member

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    It was better than expected. I was surprised at how close it mirrored the original, and yet missed the entire point of the story. The Wicker Man was a parable about the wrongness of religious intolerance, but this was just an exercise in misogyny. I might feel a bit different about it had I not seen the original, but since I have there's very little about the remake I can recommend.
     
  5. MrVess

    MrVess Guest

    Not bad at all for a remake, perhaps because rather than copying everything or making insignificant but idiotic changes, the director changed the whole subtext of the story.

    The original version, alias the "My Legs!" cut, really should have ended three minutes earlier than it had, though. The unrated version is incomparably better.

    Anyway... anything that gets rid of the horrid folk "music" of the original is worth a praise.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 6, 2007
  6. Luna

    Luna Guest

    :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  7. 4Gotten1

    4Gotten1 Guest

    I didn't think it was so bad. I feel like it kinda got a bad rap. The worst thing about it is Cage's over-acting.
     
  8. maybrick

    maybrick Well-Known Member

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    I have to admit I chuckled during the "Maam, step AWAY from the bicycle!" bit.
     
  9. maybrick

    maybrick Well-Known Member

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    I just read this thread all the the way through for the first time and I'm curious, what happens in the "6 months later" epilogue in the theatrical cut? I only watched the uncut version and really don't want to watch it again to find out. Thanks.
     
  10. _pi_

    _pi_ Peace, bitch

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    I hope this film does't make people completely distrust LaBute. His Shape of Things was one of my favorite little surprises when it was released a few months/years ago. Time flies, I can't remember when I saw it. But it was pretty remarkable. I suggest not knowing ANYTHING about it beforehand (as I did) ... I think it's an easy film to ruin if you know even little details.
     
  11. Luna

    Luna Guest

    It's super lame and eye-rollingly bad. I still laughed though, for what it's worth.

    Six months later... this chick and her friend are in a bar being chatted up by some sorry dudes and of course, you know they're gonna be the next "victims". I forget what was even said, exactly. All I know is it was crap dialogue and just the worst kind of cliche ever after all the movie puts the viewer through. It's basically like the final slap in the face to top off that giant KICK to your teeth. :lol:
    This reviewer from the IMDB puts it quite well:

    The closing coda sees the whole rotten mess collapsing under the weight of genre cliché: in a bar, two guys run into a couple of Summersisle maidens on shore leave, flirty-fishing for fresh martyrs. At the moment of their successful pick-up, you half expect the women to turn round and give an exaggerated wink and a thumbs up to the camera.
     
  12. maybrick

    maybrick Well-Known Member

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    Thanks, Luna. I think. Yeah, that's pretty much what I was expecting to hear.
     
  13. onebyone

    onebyone Guest

    It won't totally ruin my trust of him, because I know that he has done some great things. There is very powerful work in his resume. However, if he dabbles in a genre film again, which he likely won't be in a hurry to do, I may very well distrust him. He didn't show me a lick of skill in developing horror/suspense in a movie such as this one. Maybe he should just stick to psychological horror, because he is very, very gifted at that.

    However, I have watched this dvd like 6 times since I got it. It just gets funnier for me each time I watch it. I think I am in bad movie love.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 7, 2007
  14. DopeChamberX

    DopeChamberX Guest

    Just finisheed watching this earlier tongiht and couldn't agree more!! I was cracking up the whole time. I'm going to have to make sure that this gets a vote for the best "so-bad-so-good" movies a little down the line :D
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 7, 2007
  15. JW77

    JW77 Support Halliburton

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    Rented this out of curiosity last week, and I'm sort of glad I did. It really crystalized everything for me that Hollywood does wrong.

    I mean, dear God, do they have to put a car crash into everything?

    And lame-assed dream sequences?

    It was a strange experience watching this, as scene after scene was lifted directly from the original, but without the proper context. So the churchyard segment and the classroom bit just sort of pop out of nowhere and go nowhere.

    By removing the policeman's Christian beliefs, they eliminated a large amount of the subtext that was so crucial to the themes of the original without replacing them with anything else. Except for some limp-wristed McGuffin about him needing to track down a missing girl who wasn't even missing in his jurisdiction. When you get right down to it, he's a HiPo invading some insular community on a crusade to help out an old lay.

    One of the best parts of the original was the Pagan community of Summerisle, which was depicted as a fully functioning community. All of the residents were in on the plan to entrap Sgt. Howie, and they all played their parts. That aspect was all but eliminated this time around, with a sinister "sisterhood" replacing the greater community. In the remake, everyone is just fucking nuts all the time.

    Some of the bits are just laughable... watching Cage commandeer the bicycle. Watching Cage tromp around in a giant bear suit. (Bees... honey... bears... get it!)

    I watched this with a person who had never seen the original, and she seemed to enjoy it well enough, but it was kind of an unbearable (hah) experience... knowing what was coming, and watching the remake lift scenes and shots here and there. Where the original had the islanders carefully leading Howie into a very complex trap... they were, quite literally, one step ahead of him and leading him around... this one has a very weak trap set ten years in the past, and has Cage's befuddled cop ambling around a bunch of crazy women and castrated men for an hour before they finally torch him.

    Much has been made about the misogyny in this film, and there's actually quite a lot there. While watching these "wiccan" women casually killing men and forcing their will over them at every turn it's difficult to not think of Pat Robertson's quite famous claim that feminism encourages women to practice witchcraft and kill their babies.

    "The Wicker Man" (2006) comes off as "The Handmaid's Tale" by way of Rush Limbaugh. There's an extreme hatred of women and feminism that permeates the whole film.

    The lynchpin of the conspiracy plays off of the idea of women "getting pregnant" against their partner's will and then using that as a bargaining chip against them. (Which, I confess, does happen quite frequently. Half of the guys I know who have kids have them because the pill mysteriously quit working.)

    It also plays to the idea that women can't be trusted in positions of power. That, you know, if we let women be in charge they'll sacrifice us to the big bee goddess or something.

    On second thought, considering the liberties they took with the story, it's not such a bad thing that Cage wasn't presented as a Bible-thumper. This could've been a big hit with the "Left Behind" fans.
     
    Last edited: Jan 7, 2007
  16. satans-sadists

    satans-sadists Ghost

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    Just watched the remake last night. What a train wreck of a movie! I still cannot decide what has been the most gut-wrenchingly painful remake I have endured this decade: Planet of the Apes, The Amityville Horror, King Kong, or this? :nervous:

    I did laugh at a bunch of the preposterous scenes (all of which have been discussed at length by others), but in no way deem this colostomy bag of a movie worthy of a second viewing. I rented it from Netflix and still feel ripped off. My wife fell asleep less than half way into the movie.

    Nicolas Cage is beginning to have the same level of credibility as Tom Cruise. Angelo Badalamenti has scored nearly every David Lynch film. Being a long time fan of Badalamenti, I hate to say it...but the music was completely yawn inspiring. The dialogue resembled bile, the locations mundane, zero sex appeal, and the old twins speaking in unison needed to be sacrificed along with Cage.

    A lot of people around the web strongly dislike the original film for various reasons. My wife and I happen to love the original and found more in this remake to provoke anger than amusement. I would not regard this film as "So Bad...So Good" instead I would opt for "So Horrible...So Unredeemable."
     
  17. dwatts

    dwatts New Member

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    Ha! This site has recently voted this as so bad it's good, so this fully justifies their remaking it. I shall definately buy the DVD now. :)
     
  18. Buying the dvd won't bring back your god-damn honey, Dwatts!
     
  19. RyanPC

    RyanPC Guest

    More like... "Buying the DVD won't bring back your goddamn money!" :(
     
  20. rhett

    rhett Administrator

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    This is the bad pun police. Step away from the bicycle!
     

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