Awesome VHS cover art for movies that sucked...

Discussion in 'General' started by Anthropophagus, Mar 15, 2012.

  1. Anthropophagus

    Anthropophagus Well-Known Member

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    Everyone remembers walking the aisles of their favorite Mom and Pop video store in the early eighties to mid-nineties looking for that horror film vhs box cover that would catch the eye, stir the imagination and almost invariably disappoint when the movie contained within was taken home and given a viewing sometimes revealing a colossal piece of crap.
    For me it was Dawn of the Mummy and Slithis. I believe the Thorn/EMI box for Dawn of the Mummy featured a pyramid with a menacing looking mummy with outstretched arm and eyes aglow, I rented this thinking I was pretty much in for the ultimate mummy film experience. However, I was pretty much categorically disappointed by this slow paced abomination that featured minimal mummy and instead turned into a shambling living dead Romero knock off in the last act. The acting was melodramatic to the point of absurdity, the effects were no Tom Savini and the only really memorable thing were the semi-hot fashion models thrown into this mess for good measure as well as the effective dead rising from the sands scenes.
    As for Slithis, being a fanatical Creature From The Black Lagoon fan, I thought I had discovered a minor classic when I spotted the titular Slithis beast on the box cover-holy shit, what a bore though. My most vivid memory is an obese black kid chasing a frisbee to one of those moronic Laurel and Hardy type themes finding a dead dog. Later I discovered Humanoids From The Deep, the film I wish Slithis could have been.
    Anyone else have memories of incredible box covert art and not so classic films?
     
  2. ronnie21

    ronnie21 Well-Known Member

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    revenge of the dead...............
     
  3. Regurgitate

    Regurgitate New Member

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    For real. I remember renting that as a kid and wondering where the badass zombie on the cover was after I watched it.
     
  4. dave13

    dave13 Well-Known Member

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    this one? oh no, that sucks! i'd never seen it, but knew the cover, and had always wanted to see it based on that. how disappointing! also, i think this thread would work much better if the covers in question were posted. With that in mind, Anthrophophagus, is this the dawn of the mummy cover you meant? The slithis cover is pretty well known, thanks to the code red dvd, though.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2012
  5. ronnie21

    ronnie21 Well-Known Member

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    zombie nightmare. and dead pit..
     
  6. Body Boy

    Body Boy Well-Known Member

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    Dude, Dead Pit is pretty good. Zombie Nightmare is cruddy, but Dead Pit is actually a strong late 80s entry.
     
  7. Cooperkill

    Cooperkill Well-Known Member

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    Excellent call on Revenge of the Dead! I own that movie because I bought something else on eBay and the seller added it for free. Now I know why.

    These always intrigued me as a kid:

    [​IMG]

    The back of the box is better, as it shows more decapitation shots. Though the movies stink, The Slayer does have some badass murders.

    [​IMG]

    One of many "modern" covers that disguised early '70s piles of crap.

    [​IMG]

    Another one with a cool cover that had inviting pics on the back. Sadly, the movie is a wet turd.

    [​IMG]

    The cover is vicious, but the movie is a total bore.

    [​IMG]

    I used to love looking at this box when my parents weren't around. The movie, however, stinks.
     
  8. Anthropophagus

    Anthropophagus Well-Known Member

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    That's exactly it, great artwork.
     
  9. TheShape

    TheShape Member

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    [​IMG]

    Never seen this one but it totally fascinated me some 25 years at the video club. They had a carboard standee of the poster that I ended up buying (for a buck). It stayed in my room for many years.
     
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2012
  10. Hatchetwarrior

    Hatchetwarrior Well-Known Member

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    There was a ton of VHS covers that I loved as a kid, too bad the coolest VHS covers tend to be the shitiest of movies.

    [​IMG][​IMG][​IMG]
     
  11. dave13

    dave13 Well-Known Member

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    yeah, i thought video dead was pretty awful. the mutilator i enjoyed, however. although i guess it's awful too, technically.
     
  12. Cooperkill

    Cooperkill Well-Known Member

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    Forgot one:

    [​IMG]

    Looks cool, but it's a family drama/thriller.
     
  13. startide

    startide Member

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    For me it's Halloween 2. The local video store always had that one up high and it forever creeped me out. Still does (I think that's why I hold off selling the old big box clamshell I have). And yes, I don't love H2. It was OK the first time, but the second was like watching violent pornography. It was an uncomfortable and decidedly unpleasant experience.

    Shape, FWIW Mortuary is the movie that scared the crap out of me as a kid (but was not the film that turned me to the dark side, so to speak - I was already there). When I finally tracked it down again in my late teens it still scared the crap out of me and even now (nearly 20 years later!), I cannot watch it in the dark. Unlike say, Elm Street 2, which was frightening the first time I saw it (@ 11 or 12) but laughable by the time I saw it again. I look forward to the new Scorpion release (I already have the Italian disc).
     
  14. rhett

    rhett Administrator

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    Should have been the best movie of all time:

    [​IMG]
     
  15. mcchrist

    mcchrist A new breed of pervert!

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    there are a few I don't know here, like SS Experiment and Ants. But Video Dead, Mutilator, hell most of these rule. Headless Eyes even.
     
  16. ronnie21

    ronnie21 Well-Known Member

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    i rememeber that stand up of mortuary. my video store had that too. It was really big too. But really motuary was more pornagraphic than H2 was.. at least i think it had more nudity..
     
  17. Anthropophagus

    Anthropophagus Well-Known Member

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    My father bought a dvd of that for like 99 cents a few years ago, so I had to endure that film on a visit there once. Craptacular!!
     
  18. Anthropophagus

    Anthropophagus Well-Known Member

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    H2 as violent pornography? I don't get it, please explain.
     
  19. bigdaddyhorse

    bigdaddyhorse Detroit Hi-on

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    [​IMG]

    I went as far as to steal this from a place I worked since I wasn't 18 yet. All I recall is it sucked and had no redeeming value. Reading a couple reviews on amazon sorta reminds me of the disappointment I felt when this pile of shit went in my vcr. Now I love me some Claudia, but this film was/probably still is unwatchable.
     
  20. rhett

    rhett Administrator

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    I used to see this all the time in my video store, being a Canadian. Not sure if it was everywhere else, but the cover sure looked awesome:

    [​IMG]

    Saw it about 10 years ago and was supremely disappointed. Way too over the top, poor production value and an obnoxious killer. A chick did at one point remove her bikini top to make a Molotov Cocktail though.
     

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